Wednesday, January 25, 2017

journey through nursing seminar

I never imagined becoming a nurse; never dreamed of working with campus ministries at Southern; being a super senior. Much less doing my final semester of nursing on an oncology floor with patients who are going through chemo, radiation, and some of the hardest days of their life.

It's been a journey lately and I can't say it's been easy. But I can say He's been there.

And I'm sure thankful to God for the grace He's poured out in my life and the nurse who has worked with me teaching me the basics of nursing the past 12 hour shifts. Before seminar, I was lacking so much confidence in nursing, just not sure how to do many things.

I'm so thankful to God that I was given a nurse who was both kind and patient, smart yet trusting. Never underestimate the power you can give someone by believing in them. For my nurse believed in me and was a great influence and encouragement in my life. I learned so much about nursing and people in my 12 hour seminar shifts.

Nursing is a challenge beyond what I imagined because it combines ministry with work. Healing has a job title and pay raise but also limits. How do you witness patients dying and go home as soon as shift changes just to come back and realize they are gone? How do you give medicine that brings back life and yet know exactly when to gracefully sprinkle the testimony of Jesus?

There are so many questions and fears I have about nursing. I am intimidated by level four and the loads of NCLEX review content questions and adult III tests. Yet I am so excited because I am finally seeing the light at the end of the tunnel! This semester will be my last until I can take my NCLEX on my way towards working with acutely ill children and hopefully in a few years taking care of orphanage children.

I don't know the plans God has exactly for me and I will always have questions about why certain things happen. Yet I know that for me, every time I follow God and trust Him, He has provided my needs and blessed. As for now onto nursing school and finishing the this college task ahead of me.

Monday, January 9, 2017

To my wandering friend

I know that you've been wandering this past year, and I don't mean world travel, but value and self-searching. Not just finding a job but finding a man, and finding a self that isn't defined by others or old expectations. You've been trying a few things differently.

Listen to me fully, take the time to hear where I'm coming from. I don't want to judge you, I want to love you. I don't hate you, I want to care for you. I want to encourage you, but I wish you could see what you are doing and what you are sacrificing.

Don't you see that you are a rare and beautiful flower? That you are spectacular at being you? That you are the girl who sings children to sleep and makes the whole class laugh with joy. You are the one whose passion could ignite a wild fire. I see endless potential in you.

I see you looking for happiness, searching for value, for joy in the little things and I fear for you. I'm scared because I tremble at the beasts who seek to devour you. The enemy laughs and writes your name on his hand to trick you. Please don't fall.

Don't you see that you have a home? That you have a Father who calls your name and sings songs over you? Why won't you let Him fulfill your every need?

Ultimately if there were only thing I could tell you, this would be it. That no matter what you do, and how far you wonder, where you are, and what condition you are in, you can call me and I'll come running. I still am your number one fan and I am still going to be that friend.

It is never too late to come home. It is never too late to come running back to me or even better running back to Christ. Open the Word again my friend, say a short prayer. For when you feel alone, the Lord of love sees your fragile heart. Know that God is always waiting. You have never gone too far. You can always come home.

And until you do, I'll be waiting for you and I'll be praying for you.