Thursday, May 21, 2015

Friend Zoned

I was thinking earlier today about a question many girls ask that almost all guys hate Can we just be friends?

Even though I've asked it enough times, I have to admit it's a lose-lose kinda question.  Like what's the guy supposed to say, no way, we can't be friends because I totally hate you and want to avoid you for the rest of my life. Normally, he will agree to just be friends and realize that he can't express to her how much he cares or how he would like to see the relationship progress.

 In most situations, the girl asks this question right as she notices the guy really does like her and she is afraid he will want something more than she is ready to give in the relationship.

Why does she hold back and ask to just be friends? Maybe she is afraid, maybe she is insecure, maybe she doesn't think he is good enough or capable. No matter what the reason, she wants to put some limits on the relationship. She likes him.. but not enough.. Her love for him does not overcome the fear, questions, or insecurities. Her love for Him is not enough.

So let's switch around the situation now to us and God. God is the guy who is totally crazy about us and who is asking us to take our relationship to a new level. He is calling us to surrender everything to Him. He may be asking us to trust him and end a relationship, to move to a new place, to change our career, to stop with an addictive sin.

Yet for some reason, we ask God to wait. We say God I need a time out. We tell him we're not ready. We try to make excuses. We plead with him "Can we go back to just being friends?"We tell God we are content with a church relationship with Him.We ask God why our  good Christian friends,  abstinence commitment, and community service credits aren't good enough for Him.

We are scared, we are insecure, we don't trust Him enough- whatever the reason- the deeper problem lies. Do we love Him enough to give Him our entire lives? Do we trust Him enough to surrender everything?

You may be afraid to let God use you in any way He wants. You may not feel capable of the position he is asking you to fill. But I encourage you to follow God despite your fears, despite your insecurities, despite your weak faith. Show God how much you love Him by trusting Him with your plans.

Many times I have been afraid of what God was calling me. I was afraid to play baseball on a guys team, afraid to go to switch careers, afraid to be a missionary, afraid to teach a lifegroup-- every time I said to God "I'm ready to take the next step in this relationship by following you", He blessed me. I'm terrified this summer to be spiritual director- I don't feel adequate enough- yet I know that because God has called me, he will provide for me. I trust Him and will follow Him because I love Him.

What is God calling you to do? What is the next step He is asking you to make in the most important relationship ever? Do not procrastinate, do not make excuses, do not think of your own weaknesses and insecurities. Get on your knees, talk to God, and do what He is asking you to do.

Matthew 14:31- Immediately Jesus reached out his hand and caught him, "You of little faith" he said "why did you doubt?"

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