Thursday, April 23, 2015

Chivalry is courage

Just a few more thoughts about chivalry ;)

Chivalry is more than opening doors and letting a girl go first. Chivalry is deciding to be a leader in a relationship. Chivalry is to stop playing around with girls hearts and flirting with every other girl you see. Chivalry is choosing to be intentional about relationships. Chivalry is being a man of God.

Growing up as a Christian girl, I was taught to wait on guys to lead and not push them or manipulate them to do things they didn't want to do. Now at college, I often hear guys telling me, that if I like a guy, I should go flirt with them or invite them to hang out. I really have a problem with this. If a guy likes me and wants to date me, then he needs to have the courage to tell me or ask me out. Not by texting me at random times during the day or making weird excuses, but ultimately I would think that He would pray about it and if He felt peace in His heart then He could start getting to know me better or tell me.

If I start a relationship by being a manipulative girl, flirting, or trying to get a guy's attention then wouldn't I be the leader of the relationship? I don't believe that as a girl, it is my job to set myself up with potential guys. If I like a guy, I pray that if God wants me to like Him, He would give Him the courage to be a leader and that if God doesn't want the relationship to develop that He would remove the desire from my heart.

And if a guy does ask you out, I believe it's a girls job to respond with gentleness and honesty. If you don't like a guy, don't lead him on. Don't lavish in his attention even though you know you are not interested. Be aware that flirting is messing with a guys' heart if he really likes you.

I think chivalry is cool- chivalry is great- if it comes from the heart. Sure it can be a little embarrassing for us girls, but we appreciate it inside. But please don't fake it if you don't mean it. I've seen guys hold doors for girls and let go of them before she finishes walking through because he is in a hurry- awkward and unappreciated. Don't pretend to be someone your not- be real with us.

-- cool cool. That's just some scribble scrabble, random thoughts to add on to this chivalry discussion ;)

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